Just Hanging Out Kind of Friends

Rita’s uncle Oris had farmed 300 plus acres of corn and soy beans outside of Dayton, Iowa, for most of his life. Farming being what it is uncle Oris had made life-long friends of the neighboring farmers. They shared farm implements. They helped each other at harvest time, and they collaborated on solving problems from livestock diseases to barn raising.

But the depth of their life-long friendships was most obvious early on Saturday mornings when they would gather at the Chevrolet dealership of another friend, in Gowrie, for coffee and donuts. Eight or ten of them would walk around the shiny new vehicles in the showroom floor with coffee in one hand and a donut in the other, and eventually gravitate to the bed of a new pick-up truck.

With all of them leaning over the bed of the truck, sipping their coffee and occasionally taking a bite out of their donuts, it struck me that for the longest time, no one would say anything. No speculation about the weather or the price of soy beans. No questions about the newest Massey Ferguson combine.

Nothing, except the occasional slurp of hot coffee, for what seemed to me to be an eternity, but was likely not more than five or six minutes, until one of them might shift his weight to the other foot, take another sip of coffee, draw in a long breath and say, “Yep!”

And the others would nod in silent agreement.

There would be other times when these same men would be working together, helping each other with a project, maybe even some heated disagreement about government interference in farming practices.

But this time, around the bed of that brand-new pick-up truck, it was just about friends hanging out and enjoying each other’s company.

I can identify with that.

I really value those kinds of friendships.

At the end of a long day’s motorcycle ride through the challenging twists and turns of mountain passes in the Northwest, the best part of the ride is at the end of the day, with four or five good friends, settling into a spectacular meal or sitting on the porch of some flea-bag motel on those white plastic chairs, thinking about the ride, just watching the stars…and waiting for one of the guys to draw a deep breath and say, “Yep!”

I wonder if God longs for those kinds of friendships with us.

Rita and I are on vacation as I write this blog.

I wasn’t planning on writing a blog right now but woke up this morning feeling a degree of disquiet about my walk with the Lord. We have been on vacation for two weeks and it seems to me as if my relationship with the Lord has been marginal during this time.

I have still been having quiet time, but I have been easily distracted and my time with the Lord has lacked passion or depth.

And what the Holy Spirit pointed out to me this morning is that much of my passion and concentration when I am home is driven by my desperate need for Him…to give wisdom in problem solving, to give direction for ministry, insight for sermon preparation, and anointing for ministry. In other words, my friendship with the Lord is built around my need for His help…but what kind of relationship am I left with when those needs are not driving me?

That would be like uncle Oris only valuing the neighboring farmers when they were helping him do things around his farm. He would skip Saturday mornings in the showroom of Lee Benson Chevrolet.

I don’t want that kind of relationship with the Lord, where my passion for Him is only driven by my need for His help.

I want to be a “hanging out” kind of friend of His also…where my time with Him is motivated only by His presence and goodness and love for me. If it doesn’t sound too sacrilegious, I want to be content to lean over the bed of a pick-up truck with Him early on a Saturday morning, on vacation, with nothing to ask, no problem to solve, just content to be there with Him…draw a deep breath, shift my weight to another foot, and say, “Yep!”